It’s not loving, if it lacks compassion. Love is compassion, not bullying and bs. There is this thing that I’ve heard a million times, especially from behind the bar, ” Oh, he’s/she’s just like that, that’s how they show that they like you”. Yeah, ok, reminds me of getting rocks thrown at me and being chased on the playground at recess! As human beings, we’ve come a long way with technology and many other things over my lifetime. However, direct and honest communication has always been something most people avoid, and it seems to have gotten worse. The news now days is a prime example. Now, I didn’t have the pleasure of going to “high school” like most people did. [ I went up to the 8th grade, and life happened, I had to survive, and I had to work. Anyway, nobody noticed when I went to college and took my placement test that my diploma didn’t exist. Most of that college experience felt like a joke that cost too much, only got me into debt, and took my time away from my jobs. I learned, that after the 8th grade, there’s enough “lessons” just living life, and I didn’t miss much from not having the high school experience. ] What is mind boggling to me, is to see grown adults now, still exhibiting the same behavior patterns as when they were in high school. The social dynamics, which ultimately comes down to everybody caring way too much about what others think about them. Also, always talking way too much about other people instead of being real with each other. My Grandpa said this all the time, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”. Those words, like many he spoke, always stuck with me. You can’t unthrow a stone. You can’t stop a rumor once it’s on the wind. Basically, be kind and try not to spend your time, or your energy, negatively. I catch myself sometimes, like when I see that people online are laughing at the hardships and struggles of other people, instead of being grateful that it’s not their own lived experience, and maybe feeling some empathy and compassion. I admit, I feel angry before I’m able to control my thoughts and have compassion for the person who has different lenses than mine. I understand that they’re viewing this world through a partial perspective of this reality, as we all are. We are in charge of our minds, and our thoughts. We are not in charge of what other’s think, or what they choose to believe based on whatever perspective they may have which is usually limited based on personal experiences or lack thereof. We can choose to judge other’s, act better than them (like we know much better than they do about what is best for them), or attempt to make ourselves look better than them by keeping the topic off of our own bs, or we can choose to think with compassion and speak to and of other’s how we would want someone to speak to and of us. The “Golden Rule”, the simplest rule to follow, but many don’t. Some people prefer the “dog eat dog” world and don’t care who they hurt to get what they want. I am not interested in wasting my energy chasing my tail in that kiddie pool depth of an existence. We are all unique individuals, with our own stories, our own issues, and nobody needs to be hating on anybody else when we’re all out here doing the best we can (or are capable of) with the cards we’ve been dealt. It’s beyond time for us all to treat each other as we would want to be treated. Everyone wants compassion, and everyone wants love. We must give it, live it, be conscious of our thoughts and words every day. Before you engage in a conversation with someone, decide to think with your heart instead of the random opinions that fly through your mind. See what happens. When you start to notice just how much is said around you that isn’t necessary, positive, or compassionate, then start noticing how it makes you feel physically when you hear that shit talk. Energy is real, and it’s contagious. Spread love energy, with sincere compassion, watch how it blooms around you. See how it makes you feel, and how it makes other’s feel too. Eventually, we can all make Mr. Rogers proud and show him just how well we can get along with each other. We can support each other, lift each other up, instead pointing out flaws and pulling others onto our blame and shame train that only derails truths. Now, many people that read this, if they know me, will assume that I am writing about someone specific. Well, it did start with getting triggered by someone I thought was rowing in my boat with me, only to find them drilling holes when I wasn’t looking. But this isn’t the first, or the only time I have dealt with misjudgments or lack of compassion from people in my life. I send this person who inspired this post, and all the other’s that take this post personally, nothing but love. Love, Love, Love!!! I hope we all win in this game called life, but the only person I’m competing with is me. Growing, and changing our thoughts and habits, isn’t easy. Remember to be compassionate with yourself too. The love starts in you, cultivate flowers that bloom, not gas and wasted hot air.
