There are so many different kinds of pain we experience as human beings, and most is unseen. Everyone has their emotional pains that they have gone through in their life. In our culture, however, there isn’t much time, or social acceptance, for processing those emotions in a healthy way. So, by the time we’re adults, we have quite the suitcase full of unprocessed feelings. We might think we’re handling things as we should, good and strong, like we should. You know, we can’t be “victims”, because that would warrant us weak in the public perspective and open to bullying. We all know bullies gain some sort of sense of power if they can kick you when you’re down, which I will personally never understand and don’t want to. So, most of us just carry on, walking around with our feelings all stuffed into our heavy suitcases. Eventually, that suitcase is going to burst. Those painful feelings have energy, and energy is always moving and changing, it finds a way no matter what. Our deep-rooted pain cannot stay buried forever. Some people drink to tolerate it, others take pills for relief, but those methods are only suppressive bandaids. In order to heal, we must remove the bandaids. If we don’t consciously choose to take the time to heal ourselves on the inside from all the pain we’ve endured throughout our lives, it will manifest somewhere, somehow. Whether it gets unconsciously projected onto others, or manifests internally as a physical pain or disease. If there is one thing that I have learned from experience, it’s that dis ease in your soul causes disease in your body. Many of us just keep going, keep working, keep doing, keep living with the pain, until one day it makes you stop and deal with it. Sadly, this full stop that comes, can be detrimental to your survival in many ways. If you’re lucky, you will have support from loved ones to get you through it, but if you are alone in this crazy world, then it’s a whole different experience. Ultimately, we are all completely alone when it comes to our individual experiences with pain, and most of us carry a pain that can’t be seen through our exterior appearance. We “look ok”, so we should be “ok”, when we’re not. I am healing. I have been working on myself, while accepting the judgments and criticism from others. I understand that “others” have their own pain, and I no longer absorb it. I am learning to empathize, without carrying all the pain that exists around me in this world, because that suitcase is just too heavy for me to carry. I have had severe back pain for so long that it’s become a constant nuisance in my life, and I am finally feeling understood and seen, as I am getting therapy for some relief. I have also had emotional pain from abuse, abandonment, and betrayals of my trust that I have had to forgive and process. This biggest pain in me, which I know I am not alone, is the grief. Too many loved ones that I can’t hug anymore. I know they are ok where they are, and some are still around me in spirit, but I really miss their hugs. For this now full suitcase that is busting at the seams, I am starting therapy with someone more experienced in unpacking this pain. I am not ashamed to admit, there are some things that are just too much for me to handle alone, so I am seeking help from others that can assist me in healing my mind, my body, and my overall wellbeing. It’s time to not only empty the suitcase, but to make myself a brand new one with lots of room inside for joy, love, truth, and a healthy kind of happiness. Pretending that we are not in pain, especially to appease others, only hurts us in the long run. Open your suitcase, unpack that pain, lay it out on the table, let’s talk about it, and care about each other as we learn how to heal ourselves.
